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Divine Desire

By Stephanie Guerrero

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“If you call the Sabbath a delight and the Lord’s holy day honorable, and if you honor it by not going your own way and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, then you will find your joy in the Lord…”
~Isaiah 58:13b-14a









Chapter One
“Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.”
~Jeremiah 33:3

The cold blanket of fear descended like the Grim Reaper wrapping its swirling fingers around August Trevino’s heart. It didn’t matter where he was: at home, in the park or even riding in the family car; he quaked as the unwelcome Spector made his appearance once again. He shuddered. Though it didn’t happen very often, it was frequent enough to leave a question mark in August’s twelve-year-old mind.
“What is going on?” he stammered to no one in particular. Fear appears for no reason at all. Am I afraid something is going to happen to my mom or dad? Did I just get some bad news? Is the world coming to an end? He grappled for some shred of evidence to point to the reason for such random fear. None ever availed.
The sound of his mother’s voice provided a welcome distraction. He knew what she was going to ask, and maybe this time… he would go. He forced his feet to walk downstairs where he knew his Mother would prod him one more time to get involved in the youth group at church. He stuck his head in the kitchen.
“Did you call me, Mom?”
She smiled warmly and tilted her head in concern. “August, why don’t you start going to the youth group meetings on Sunday nights,” she poked. “You might meet some new friends in church. Jarod is wanting you to go too.”
August nodded. Jarod had been bugging him to come for some time. The promise of good times, lots food and a youth room with its own new stereo system was a tempting idea. It was better than waiting around for the unnamed fear to strike his heart again.
“All right, Mom. I’ll go,” he decided quickly.
“I’m glad, son. Go run a comb through your hair, and meet me at the car in ten minutes.”

One Sunday night lead to another and then another and then another. It was one of the greatest decisions he’d ever made, he thought as he looked around the room. He’d made new friends, enjoyed new experiences, and tonight… he sported his brand-new Bible.
Of course, if you go to church you have to have a Bible, he reasoned. He’d taken a bus ride to the local Christian bookstore to purchase a Bible. He lifted it to his nose and breathed in. This Bible was all his… a prized possession. The leather smell was intoxicating. That was just the start! He’d already read through The Gospels, and the Book of Acts, but this week he’d started Romans and something amazing was happening. He was understanding the words!
A highlighter became his best friend as he first ran across Romans 3:23. “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” Next came Romans 6:23 about the free gift of eternal life in Christ. Finally, the coup de gra… Romans 10:9-10… the command to confess and believe.
Youth was breaking up for the evening, but something stirred his heart. “I’ve always believed in God’s word that Jesus is God the Son, but I’ve never confessed it to God…” he reasoned in awe.
He glanced around the church. The pastor was tidying up, and his mom had not yet arrived to pick him up. An idea stirred. Desiring to be obedient to God’s word, he slipped into the sanctuary unnoticed and made his way down to the altar. With a simple childlike faith, he spoke aloud.
“God, I never told you this, but I want to be a Christian. Wherever you tell me to go, and whatever you tell me to do from now on, I will do it. In Jesus name, Amen.”
He rose from the altar in time to hear the honk of his mom’s car horn. Slipping back out the sanctuary door, he paused and looked back wondering if anything had changed.

Something had changed. August seemed to be a new person. The random waves of fear that would come over him for no reason at all had vaporized. Reflecting back, it had been a while, sometime since the middle of last year when one of these random episodes reared their ugly head.
The 3rd period bell rang, signaling class was beginning. Leaving his locker, he scrambled to make it to class on time. Anyone not in their seat by bell time and it was off to the Vice-Principle, Mr. Jones. He slipped into his seat just in the nick of time and shook his head at the close call. Vice-Principle Jones handled discipline in the school, and you did not want to be told to go to his office. Whispers of awe and terror wafted through the campus. Students lived in fear of the man, and one even went so far as to draw devil horns and a pitchfork on his picture in the school year book.
As class assignments were handed out, Augie reflected again on the lack of panic attacks.
“Could it be that I’m in junior high and on the top of my game in football?” He enjoyed fleeting moments of being big man on campus since he made fullback for the South East Raiders, and they’d made it all the way to the city playoffs.
“No, that’s not it,” as he checked those reasons off in his mind. “As a matter of fact, I’m not concerned at all with what people think about me… if I’m popular or not.” A flash of realization illuminated his soul,
“That’s what it is,” he proclaimed to himself with all the pride of a mountain climber who summits the highest peak, “It’s because Christ lives in me, I’m a new creation. Since I prayed down at the altar of St. Luke’s, I haven’t had a single fear attack.”
That must be it, he reflected. That was the moment that made the difference! Everything changed. Where he’d once had an empty void that fear tried to fill; He now felt purpose, hope and was filled beyond capacity with the love of God.
He’d recently read in his Bible that if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. Old things are passed away. Behold all things become new…
That’s who I am! Augie thought. That explains it! That verse describes me; I am a new creation! I don’t know what God has in store for me, but whatever it is it is I want it. It has to be more than what I can imagine for myself, he mused in wonder. God’s will is perfect. He has plans for me, and I can trust him.
Augie now had purpose, God had a plan, and that was enough.

Several years later…
The sun sparkled on the small lake as a gentle wind rippled the water. Tall pines towered overhead, and the scent of gardenias wafted through the air. It was a perfect spring day for wistful thinking, and fourteen-year-old Virginia Hampton was doing just that. Turning her face to the sky, she smiled a secret smile.
I wonder, she mused and twirled with hands outstretched. What the man I’m going to marry is doing right now? Could he be thinking about me too? God, don’t let us meet until we are both ready, but would you mind arranging my perfect match?
A sudden vision flashed before her eyes. She froze at the image. A long oval table filled with Christ-followers and unbelievers offered warm conversation in a comfortable home. She instinctively knew the home belonged to her and her future husband.
You will be ministering alongside your husband…
Stunned, she breathed in the sweet perfume of the gardenias and squeezed her eyes shut to absorb the vision. The small glimpse into the future gave her hope. Her own family had so recently fallen apart.
Oh, Father God, please wait to bring us together until we are both ready. Grow in us a divine desire for more of you and keep us pure for each other.
That night the fireflies twinkled against the black sky gently wafting up to heaven along with Virginia’s prayers. Kneeling beside her canopy bed, she cried out to her heavenly Father. For so long, she had dreamed of a knight in shining armor swooping in to be her hero. She’d tried putting guys she knew into her stories, her fantasies, but her heavenly father convicted her.
Philippians 4:8 kept returning to mind, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.”
Making a choice, she set the daydreams aside, and began to pray. “God, I don’t know who you’ve chosen for me, or where he is in this moment, or even how old he is; but You know him. Protect him, please. Help him to stay pure and to walk with You always.”
From that night on… it became her prayer.
One morning before the crack of dawn, Virginia awakened with the intense urge to open her Bible to I Corinthians 13. Rolling out of bed, she muttered to the dark hallway as she stumbled blindly toward the family room looking for her Bible.
“I Corinthians 13…? Why do I need to read that again? I already have it memorized. Everyone knows that’s the ‘love’ chapter.” The Spirit pierced her soul with conviction over her attitude.
“I’m sorry, Father,” she confessed as she turned the pages of her Bible to the chapter He’d directed. As the pages fell open, she heard her heavenly Father’s voice as clear as a bell. “I’m going to teach you about love.”
“Yes, Lord,” her heart acquiesced.
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol…”
I wonder what He’s preparing me for? she pondered and began to read…

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