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Mary Grace and the Clarview Girls

By Debra Burr Downing

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Chapter 1

My entire life changed between my freshman and sophomore years
of high school. My father’s company transferred him to Ontario,
Canada. Now, this doesn’t sound so bad, except, I had spent my entire
life growing up in a small town just outside Atlanta, Georgia. All my
family members are southerners, my mother from North Carolina, my
father from South Carolina. And of course, the influence of my home
state of Georgia. Not only did we experience the shock of long, snow-filled
winters with freezing temperatures, but many Canadians had a
hard time understanding our southern drawl and our constant use of
“you all”. It was a culture shock for all of us.

Life is certainly different now! To make things even more exciting
and different, I now have a chance to go to a Canadian boarding school
called Clarview. It’s just for girls and I get to live on the campus like I
am going off to college, but it’s still a high school. I want to do this more
than anything. It is a chance to really grow up and besides, I am sixteen
now! My parents are great and I love living at home with them, but
when I visited this school several months ago, I just couldn’t get it out
of my mind. It’s awesome. It even looks like an English castle, but what’s
really important to me is that it’s my first chance to have roommates. I
don’t have any brothers or sisters, so this would be like having a whole
school of sister-like friends! The big question now is, how am I going to
talk my parents into letting me go, especially my mother?

Our conversations this summer have gone something like this.
“No, you can’t go!” my mother says with a half-determined, half stressed
look on her face.

“Why?” I ask raising my hands half-way into the air and turning
around in a circle.
“Because.”
“Because why?”
“Because, Mary Grace, you are our only child, our baby,” my mother
says with a sigh.

“I’m sixteen!” I wail as I put my hands over my head and turn back
around in sheer frustration.

“I think she will be fine, Bonnie,” my father chimes in.
My mother shoots a disapproving look in his direction and continues
her defense, “A girl’s boarding school? Why on earth would you
want to go so far away to a girls’ school?”
“Mama, it’s only 20 miles away!” I say as I point to the living
room window.

“If you had binoculars, you could almost see me,” I groan.
“No!” she replies.
“Why, WHY???” I plea.
“Because.”
“Because, why?”
“Just because.”

“Mama, I think we have already chased this rabbit. I really, REALLY
want this. I want to go and live in the dorm with all those other girls and
have some excitement in my life. It’s a dream come true for me.”

Mama turns to face me. “You really do want this, don’t you? It’s all
you’ve talked about for the last month, this Clarview Boarding School!”
“I really do,” I reply, trying to hold back the tears.

Daddy comes over and slips his arm around my shoulders. “Bonnie,
she’s sixteen. We can’t keep her here forever. She’ll be going off to college
in a few years, anyway. Let her have her dream.”

My parents and I have always been very close. I love my parents.
They are so good to me and I know they love me, so I hope they will
understand why I want this more than anything.

Mama’s face softens. She sighs again and says, “It’s bad to want something
as much as you want this and not at least get a chance at it. Okay,
I guess I can learn to live without you for a while.”

I throw my arms around her and smile at Daddy over her shoulder. I can always depend on him to run interference for me.

“You know, you will have to wear a uniform to school,” Daddy says.
“Uniforms? I never thought about that!”

“Well, you will,” he continues, “In fact, as soon as you’re accepted
into the school, you’ll need to go shopping. And, Mary Grace,” Daddy
continues, “They don’t allow students to have cell phones.”

“You’re kidding?” I respond in disbelief.

“That’s right. It’s right here in the rules and regulations, but I promise
to take good care of your phone for you.” Daddy says with a slightly mischievous
smile on his face.”

Well… it’s not what I want, but it’s such a beautiful place and I want
it so much, I think I can get used to just about anything if I can just get
into this school!

Our neighbor’s mother had attended Clarview and she had encouraged
me to go see it. When we visited the school earlier this summer, just
out of curiosity, I couldn’t believe it. It’s like an old English castle with
huge evergreen trees stretching into the sky. It was like I had just stepped
back in time to some faraway country. In Georgia, there just aren’t any
castles! Clarview is the most beautiful school I have ever seen. When
I walked up to the massive doors of the school last month, it was like
they were talking to me “Come here, and live a whole new life. Come,
and you will never be the same again.” I was immediately awestruck by
this school.

From that day forward, I was determined to talk Mama into letting
me go. I guess she probably regrets agreeing to let me even visit the
school. I think she thought I would chicken out after I saw those big,
massive buildings.

But, I’m not going to chicken out. I am going to do this!
When my acceptance letter finally came, I decided to buy my uniform
immediately. I didn’t want to give Mama any time to change her mind.

“Ready, Mary Grace?” Daddy asks as he opens the big, black door
to his beloved Lincoln Continental car. The ride across the Canadian
countryside is gorgeous. Today, I can see fields of corn. In a few months,
it will be mountains of snow, more snow than even I can imagine.

When we finally get to the department store, we make our way to
the back where the school uniforms are sold; Daddy hands the list to
the grumpy looking saleslady. Without saying a word, she takes the list
and disappears behind some swinging doors. Several minutes later, she
returns with hangers of clothes and a pair of shoes; at least I think that’s
what they are, shoes, that is.

As I stare down at the heavy, black leather shoes, my mind stops cold.
Surely this is not what the school requires us to wear. These ugly things!
I look up at Daddy. He is trying not to laugh.
“Well, baby, maybe you could just borrow my shoes instead!”
“Probably so,” I whine.

“What do you call these things?” I ask the saleslady.
She gives me a disapproving look and replies. “Oxfords, Black
Oxfords. Every Clarview girl has them,” she retorts.

“Oh well, if this is what the school requires, Black Oxfords, then I
guess I will have to get used to them. Do I have everything else on the list?”
“Yes, two navy skirts, five white cotton blouses with rounded collars,
two navy sweaters, one gold blazer with the school’s crest on the
pocket, five pairs of knee socks, one black tie, one pair of dress shoes
and her voice pauses for a moment …. and one pair of Black Oxfords,”
she replies as she looks down at me over the tiny glasses perched at the
tip of her nose.

I look over the list once more and agree with her. Daddy pays the
bill with a slight chuckle under his breath and Mama winks at me. They
both know that this is a big day in my life.

Soon, I will pack my suitcases, and in two days, my journey as a
Clarview girl will begin!

The two days pass quickly and unfortunately, a flock of butterflies
has decided to take up permanent residence in my stomach. They also
decide that they will make the exciting, but yet very nervous ride to
school with me. Honestly, I think to myself, “I will only be 20 miles
from home, just a few Canadian villages away, but I might as well be on
the other side of the world!”

“Excited, baby?” Daddy asks as he wheels the big, black Lincoln into
the circular driveway of Clarview.

“Oh, yeah, I mean, ‘Yes sir’. I’m excited!” I was actually hoping he
would not look in the rear-view mirror and see two scared brown eyes
staring back at him.

Mama raises one eyebrow and looks back at me. “You don’t have to
do this, you know?”

“Yes, ma’am, I know,” trying to keep the quivers out of my voice, “but
I really want to.” hoping this statement will convince her and me.

“Okay, but if you change your mind, you can always come home.”

The car finally comes to a stop. The three of us walk slowly up the
stone stairs. The doors look much bigger than I remembered from our
summer visit. Daddy pauses and opens the door. A whole new world
appears before me. I can feel my eyes getting bigger and bigger and my
breath getting shorter and shorter.

I take my first step inside and see the huge foyer, the long winding
staircase, and I can smell the polish on the beautiful, old, antique furniture.
It’s more than I can take in at one time. It is a dream come true!

“Hello, I am Dr. Davis, the principal of Clarview. You must be the
Anderson family. I have been expecting you. Please come in.”

We follow her to an elegant room called the parlor, a kind of fancy
living room. I feel so small as I look up at the high ceilings of this
beautiful room. I look around at the satin-covered couches and the tiny
tea tables. Dr. Davis motions for us to sit down and then seats herself on
a satin chair with small pink flowers and green leaf designs were sewn into the
material of the chair. I can feel myself starring at her, but I just can’t help
it. Her soft blue sweater and silk blouse match her blue eyes perfectly!
Her voice is soft but confident. Her slightly graying auburn hair makes
her the picture of elegance. Her expression is kind and gentle, unlike any
principal I ever remembered; they had all been men! Will, I ever have
that much poise and elegance I think to myself? I hope so!

“Would you like some tea?” she offers.

“Oh, no thank you. We are fine.” my mother replies. Thank goodness, I thought. I am much too nervous to try and balance a delicate teacup in my lap.

As Dr. Davis begins to explain the general routines and expectations
of the school, a sense of calm comes over me. I feel secure in her
presence, yet so in awe of her. Can I be a Clarview lady? Can I be like
her, someday?

Dr. Davis introduces us to Mrs. Moore, the assistant principal, who
is a very pleasant lady in a black suit. She has brown eyes and short,
blondish hair. She leads us up the grand staircase to the second floor. I
can feel the smooth rich wood of the handrails under my fingertips. At
the top of the stairs, Mrs. Moore takes a right turn and continues to the
end of the hallway to my room.

It is a nice room with two twin beds and a circular sitting room surrounded by windows off of the left side. I had actually noticed the circular towers at the opposite ends of the building when Daddy drove through the gates. I look out the window and see my parent’s car below. What a great room! I even have a view of the two beautiful evergreen trees outside the windows.

“Ericka will be your roommate, but I am not sure where she is at the
moment,” says Mrs. Moore. “I will wait in the hallway and give you a
moment to tell your parents goodbye.”

Mrs. Moore leaves the room and I turn to tell Mama and Daddy
goodbye, but I just can’t speak. I decided just to give them a quick hug
and sort of gently push them out of the room. I have been so sure of
this decision and now it seems so scary. Am I losing my nerve already?
I haven’t even been here an hour yet! As I lean against the doorway, my
stomach is churning as my parents walk away, but I can’t let those butterflies
overwhelm me.

Mama and Daddy turn at the top of the staircase to wave goodbye. I’m excited, I’m finally here, but I have to blink my eyes several times to force back the tears as I watch them walk down the stairs. Finally, I can no longer see the top of their heads. I really didn’t think it would bother me this much to see them leave. Well, I am on my own now, I think to myself. Really, on my own. So very much on my own. I don’t feel sixteen anymore, I feel more like six.

As I start to unpack, I get this funny feeling that I am being watched.
I turn around to see a girl who is slightly taller than me standing in
the doorway.

“That’s my bed. Sorry.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize,” I respond and immediately start moving my
things to the other bed, dropping a few things out of nervousness.
As I lean over to pick up my things off the floor, I hear this girl say,
“You don’t look like I thought you would.”

“Oh?” I respond trying to hide my rather shaky voice.

“Somehow I pictured you with long blonde curls and big blue eyes
and lots of dresses and big hats. I mean you are a southern girl from
Georgia, right? And you probably lived in a big beautiful house with
lots of Magnolia trees around it.

“Really?” I reply. Now this hits me as really funny since those days of
the Old South are long gone and I try not to snicker at her notion of me.
“I guess I have been watching too many old American movies.” She
responds. “I hope I didn’t hurt your feelings.”

“No,” I respond. “I guess I am just a little nervous since this is my
first day and all of that.”

“Well,” she continues, “That’s normal, things will get worse, I mean
better,” she adds with a twinkle in her eye.

“Oh, by the way, my name is Ericka. I have been here since 6th grade
and have every intention of graduating from Clarview.”

“Good,” I said. “I plan to be back in the States by my senior year
because we have only twelve grades there not thirteen like you do here.
Oh, and my name is Mary Grace.”

“I know,” she says. “News travels fast around here. You know, you
being the new girl from the States and all of that.”

“Well, I guess so and at the moment, your name is the only one I know.”
Ericka smiles back at me and I think to myself, “I hope she is going
to like me. I really need a friend right now.”

I begin to hang up my clothes and put away the rest of my things
when I come across my Oxford shoes.

“I will be glad when I get these things broken in,” I say with a sigh.
Ericka laughs and says “Don’t you know? You don’t break-in
Oxfords, they break in you!”

I hate to admit it, but she was right. It took those Oxfords about
three weeks to reshape my feet to “their” liking. I don’t think my feet
will ever be the same again.

We chat for a while longer and Ericka wanders off to another room.
I didn’t see her again until bedtime, which is 10 p.m. I am already in bed
and pretend to be asleep. It has been a long day and I really don’t want
to talk anymore. I just want to try to chase away those butterflies and
convince myself I had done the right thing. Right?

To my great relief, it doesn’t take me long to fall asleep and dream
about what my future will be like.

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