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When I Close My Eyes

By Elizabeth Musser


Could she ever share the secret of The Awful Year?
There is one story that novelist Josephine Bourdillon shirked from writing.
And now she may never have a chance. Trapped in her memories, she lies in a coma.

The man who put her there is just as paralyzed. Former soldier Henry Hughes
failed to complete the kill. What’s more, he never received the full payment—
funds that would ensure surgery for his son.

As detectives investigate disturbing fan letters, a young but not-so-naive Paige
Bourdillon turns to her mother’s tormented past for answers. Could The Awful Year
be worse than the one they’re living now?
Set against the flaming hills of North Carolina and the peaceful shores of the Mediterranean Sea, When I Close My Eyes tells the story of two families struggling with dysfunction and finding that love is stronger than death.

Book Takeaway:

Faith and mental illness are not mutually exclusive.

“It’s grace, babe. That’s what it’s called. Grace. You’re forgiven, and you don’t have to pay anything back to God.”

Why the author wrote this book:

I wanted to explore how depression and other mental illnesses affect families as well as how grace is received or rejected. Other themes include 'Can you love someone too much?' and the role of irony and hypocrisy in a Christian faith.


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