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Justice for Jessie

By Brenda C. Poulos

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CHAPTER ONE

Meg’s trembling hands fumbled for the latch and swung the driver’s door open, sending her tumbling to the asphalt below. Tears blurred her sight, mascara running in unchecked rivulets down her face and onto the collar of her crisp white blouse. “Help! Someone, help!”
She pushed up to her feet, berating herself for not giving in to Renn’s entreaties to get a cell phone. If she’d carried one with her today, she’d be able to call 911. Get help for the motionless child in the crosswalk just a few feet away.
She looked heavenward, mouthing a silent prayer to the powers that be to send someone to help. Someone that would notice the flashers and stop. Someone not nearly as stubborn as herself.
Someone with a phone.
Stumbling forward, she kept her eyes trained on the tiny body in front of her blue van. As she got nearer, she realized it was a girl in a pink flowered dress. The streetlight at the intersection revealed a light-colored backpack with Lucie Carter written above the zipper in bold black marker. She lay perfectly still. Legs askew. Still clutching a wet paper towel wrapped around two yellow sunflowers. No doubt a gift for her teacher on this, the first day of school.
Small grains of gravel embedded themselves into Meg’s knees as she knelt beside Lucie, hesitating just a moment before rolling her over and studying her vacant sky-blue eyes. Is she dead? Have I killed a child? Oh, God, no! Nauseous and overwhelmed with sudden guilt, her shoulders shook uncontrollably.
All at once, she sobered and swiped at her eyes with the back of her hands. She looked around in every direction. Hers was the only car on the road.
She glanced at her watch. 6:10. Much too early for Lucie to be out—even on a school day. The crossing guard wouldn’t even be on duty for more than an hour.
Meg looked back at the child. She should check for a pulse. If she was still alive, there might be time to get her to a hospital.
She bent closer. Felt her neck, …her wrist. It was weak, but a pulse was there. Or was she simply imagining it?
Oh, what to do? The right thing, Meg. Do the right thing.
If help wasn’t going to come to her, she’d have to go to it. First things first. Get her in the car.
She’d rush her to the nearest emergency room. Give what few details she could. She must live nearby. They’d find her family.
Maybe everything would be okay.
She opened the rear door on the passenger side, picked up the child’s limp body, and placed her gently on the back seat. She hesitated, taking in the perfect features of her face. No sign of pain on her delicate rosebud lips.
Would that somehow comfort her parents when they saw their daughter in the morgue? What a morbid thought. No negative thinking allowed. Only thoughts of life.
Precious life.
She couldn’t waste time.
Her heart raced as she drove away, her mind’s eye reviewing the scene one last time. No blood. Nothing disturbed. It was almost as if this horrible twist of fate had never happened.
She looked over her shoulder at the colorless form against the black leather seat behind her. Dare she entertain the thoughts taking shape in her mind?

***

Rachel poured Jack a second cup of coffee and settled onto the cane-backed chairs beside him. She reached for his hand and bowed her head. “Father, we thank you for this day and ask a special blessing on our daughter as she experiences her first day of school. We ask for an extra measure of patience for her teacher because we know Lucie’s impulsivity can be trying. Help us, as parents, to relinquish our control and not be so quick to rush in and fix each situation for her. She needs to learn for herself how to get along with others. Thank you for the blessing of having such an endearing—although rambunctious—little girl in our family. Amen.”
Jack gave her hand a squeeze before releasing it to grab his fork. He smiled his famous Jack Carter smile and dug into the pancakes and sausage on the plate in front of him. “I’m surprised she’s not up yet, Rach. She was so excited about her first day of school, she had a hard time going to sleep last night,” he mumbled between bites of his favorite breakfast.
“She’s usually grouchy when I first wake her up. But getting up earlier is something she’s going to have to get used to. Anyway, she’ll want to give you a hug and a kiss before you take off. Just leave the dishes. I’ll have plenty of time to wash them this morning.” She kissed his cheek as she left the room. “I’ll be right back with our sleepyhead.”

***

A moment later, Jack heard a blood-curdling scream. He bolted down the hallway and into the master bedroom where a frantic Rachel was slipping a sweatshirt over her head. “She’s gone, Jack. Her backpack isn’t hanging on the hook by her door. Her new shoes and dress are missing from the closet. We’ve got to find her. It’s barely light out. No telling what could happen.”
Jack grabbed his jacket from the coat closet and helped Rachel with hers. “Let’s take the route to school. I’ll bet she headed there, not realizing it was much too early.”
“I don’t like this, hon. Her leaving the house without us knowing,” Rachel said as she followed him to the driveway. “She must have left when it was still dark.”
Jack fumbled with the keys, unlocking the door to the truck, and helping his very pregnant wife inside. He rubbed his hands together to warm them as he rounded the vehicle and slipped inside. Fall was coming early this year.
Rachel let out a nervous laugh. “I’m glad it’s only a few blocks. We’ll probably find her curled up by her classroom door.”
“Sure,” Jack agreed. But something inside gave him pause. Had Lucy found her own way, or had she somehow gotten turned around? What if she hadn’t headed in the direction of the school, after all, but instead walked toward the interstate? God, please let us find our daughter safe and sound.
He pulled into the empty parking lot. Room 1 was clearly visible from the truck. His heart fell when he didn’t see Lucie waiting outside. He scrambled from his seat, leaving the door open and calling to Rachel over his shoulder, “Stay put. I’ll run around the perimeter. If I don’t see her, we’ll drive in the opposite direction. I’ll be right back.”
As he jogged around the building and onto the playground, Jack thought about how far Lucie had come. Born prematurely. Reaching milestones months later than other children her age. It had taken its toll on Rachel’s health—and their relationship. But they’d kept their faith in God, and he’d brought them through. Back to a place of happiness. So much so that they’d felt ready to add another child to their family.
Now this.
***

EMERGENCY ENTRANCE in flickering neon letters loomed in front of Meg’s van. Her hands shook as she reached for the door handle. Be honest. You knew the minute you picked her up she was dead. So why even bring her here?
Over the past three miles, she’d wrestled with that question. Rehearsed her story about how she’d found the girl on the side on the road. Barely breathing, she’d died only moments ago.
Getting involved in this would only complicate their lives—hers and Renn’s. Her heartbeat quickened. She’d never been in a situation like this before. Never even so much as received a parking ticket.
She pulled a tissue from her purse to catch the bile that had risen in her throat. If she didn’t control her emotions, she’d need medical help herself. She wasn’t cut out for lying and deception.
But why lie? She’d done nothing wrong. Not really. She hadn’t meant to hit her.
The child’s parents must be frantic.
She dabbed an already soggy tissue at the tears slipping down her cheeks and took in a deep breath as she slid the door open. Keep it together. Stay calm.

***

“Not today of all days, Jack,” Rachel managed to eke out between contractions. “We should be helping the police search for our daughter.”
“We knew this was coming, Rach. You’ve had false labor for the last few days. We’ll take it moment by moment. I’ll either stay with you or keep looking for Lucie, depending on what the doctors tell us. In the meantime, we’ll keep praying.”
Rachel nodded. “Having our second baby should be such a happy time for us.”
“It still can be. We’ll find Lucie and all celebrate together. You know how much she wants a little sister. It’s all she talks about.”
Rachel smiled through her tears. “You’re right. Everything will work out.”
A dark blue van seemed to come out of nowhere, pulling in front of their truck and causing Jack to swerve and come to an abrupt stop. “Hey, watch it, lady. You’re going to kill someone driving like that,” he yelled.
The woman rolled down her window. “I’m so, so sorry. It’s just that—”
Rachel reached out to touch Jack’s arm. The woman’s eyes were red and swollen. She was having a rough start to her day, too. “I’m okay, hon.”
Jack let out a deep breath and nodded. “I didn’t mean to jump on you. I can see you’re upset. I hope the rest of your day goes well. Just be careful, okay?”
“Yes. Thank you. I will.”
Jack parked the truck in front of the double doors of the emergency room and hurried around to the passenger side to help Rachel out. Taking her hand, he bowed his head. “Lord, please watch over both of our daughters. Let Lucie be found safe and the birth of our little one be easy on Rachel. Give our doctors skill and wisdom. Help us to trust in your timing.”

***

Maybe I should give up driving. First Lucie. Then I almost hit that young man and his wife at the hospital. Mom and Dad were still driving in their mid-eighties, but I seem to be falling apart at sixty-one. Meg slowed the van on a gentle curve of road not far from the elementary school. Gravel crunched underneath the tires as she pulled off the pavement and stopped a hundred yards or so from a small grouping of oak trees.
The grass there was green and lush. A picturesque setting where a little girl could rest.
The wind was picking up a bit, blowing Meg’s hair in front of her face and teasing the edges of her skirt as she made her way to the side of the van. Even though the brisk winds here in Highland Ridge were annoying, she still liked looking feminine in dresses and skirts. Some called her old-fashioned. She didn’t care. Renn liked the way she dressed, and his opinion was the only one that mattered.
She looked both ways down the long stretch of road and, finding no other cars coming or going, grabbed the handle of the van’s side door and slid it open. She startled at the appearance of the child sprawled across the seat. Her skin pale. Lips blue.
She had just slipped her arms underneath the girl’s shoulders when a car approached, then slowed. She turned her back to the road, shielding Lucie from the onlooker and allowing Meg to keep from making eye contact. Still, she flinched when the female spoke.
“Car trouble? Need help?”
“Oh, no thanks. Just taking a break. Seemed like a nice shady place to stop,” she answered.
“That it is. Well then, I’ll be going. Have a nice day.”
“Thanks for your concern.” Meg waited until the car was out of sight before carrying Lucie’s body down the steep embankment and laying her gently under the trees. She paused to catch her breath. “You’ll be in plain view. They’ll find you soon, call your parents, and that will be that.”
She stood in silence for a few minutes, considering an appropriate goodbye. She decided that “Nice meeting you” or “Have a nice life” sounded awkward, so she turned away without saying anything.
As she reached the road, the toe of her shoe hit against the uneven pavement, causing her to fall and scrape both elbows. Once she regained her footing, she walked the remaining few steps to the car, droplets of blood falling onto the roadway.
An ache formed in her heart.
She swallowed the lump in her throat. She was in the clear. She’d go home to a nice warm breakfast, a cup of hot tea, and the novel she’d purchased yesterday on her outing with Marge.
But thinking about what she’d done made her heart hurt.
Could she live with the choices she’d made today? The lies she might tell tomorrow?

***

The rain slackened as Jack stood at the hospital window staring blankly into the parking lot. People without umbrellas dashed toward the doors, jackets pulled over their heads. In the distance, a double rainbow appeared over the mountaintops.
Blackness closed around him as an exhausted and grief-stricken Rachel lay sleeping. They’d given her a sedative right before he broke the news to her, his voice choked with tears.
One life taken. Another beginning.
Little Sara Violet snuggled in his arms. She had come into the world on the same day her sister Lucie Rose winged her way heavenward.

***

Meg swallowed, took a deep breath, and slipped her key into the lock. The familiar sound of the News at Five blaring from the family room television caused her pulse to race. The reality that perhaps they’d found Lucie’s body already hit her like a ton of bricks. The investigation would begin and perhaps go on for days—even months. Until, eventually, the killer would be found.
“That was a long walk. Even for you. The news is almost over,” Renn said as he patted the seat beside him on the leather sofa. “Come on. Watch the last segment with me.”
“Looks like it’s on commercial. I’ll be there after I get a drink,” she replied, disappearing down the hallway.
He followed her into the kitchen where she stood staring out the window. “Hon?”
Meg turned around, her eyes glistening with moisture. “What, Renn?”
He opened the corner cabinet, removed a large plastic tumbler, and handed it to her. “Want ice?”
She shook her head, reaching for the faucet. “They say room temperature is best.”
“Who?”
“Oh, magazine articles. Health shows.”
“Since when do you watch medical shows?”
“I don’t. I just—”
“Hey, the news is back on.” Renn shuffled back into the family room and turned up the volume. “It’s starting, Meg. Are you coming?”
Their favorite newscaster, Brett Nichols, was standing in front of the elementary school just down the road from their home. Meg recognized the school’s stylized Jaguar Mascot on the sign adjacent to the visitors’ parking lot.
Renn turned to her. “Looks like something happened at the school.”
A banner ran across the television screen indicating that the next story was an update from an earlier broadcast. Her chest constricted as she settled herself on the sofa next to Renn. When Lucie’s image filled the screen, her breath caught in her throat. “Lucie,” she whispered. She glanced in Renn’s direction, calming when she felt certain he hadn’t heard the slip of her tongue.
He’d leaned forward, not wanting to miss a word, his eyes green pools of compassion. He
had a thing for kids. Always had. The fact that they’d never been able to have any of their own had only intensified his adoration of anyone with a missing tooth, freckles, or pigtails. They’d adopted a twelve-year-old girl later in life, but Meg knew he’d always wished for a newborn or an exuberant toddler.
“The child’s body was found a half-mile down the road from the school, laying under the oak trees at the eastern end of Wes Tucker’s ranch. We will update you as more information becomes available,” the reporter said. “If anyone has any information, no matter how insignificant it might seem, please contact the number on your screen.”
Meg’s cheeks heated as sudden tears blurred her vision. She stole a second look at Renn only to find him staring at her. “What?” she asked.
“Did you know the little girl, Meg?”
She shook her head. “Of course not. Why would you ask?”
“You said her name before the reporter did.”
“You’re mistaken.”
“I distinctly heard—.”
“Please, Renn. I’ve had a hard day so far.”
“You call going to a medical appointment, coming home to breakfast made by yours truly, and taking a leisurely walk a ‘hard day’?”
Memories of the accident flooded Meg, shame and sorrow melding into one cohesive and formidable emotion. She jerked away when his arms pulled her close. “You have no idea.”
“Hon, I’m sorry. Did something go wrong at your doctor’s appointment? I thought it was just a yearly check-up, or I would have gone with you. Tell me. Whatever it is, we’re in this together.”
She buried her face in her hands. How had she thought she could keep something this big from Renn—the man who knew her better than she knew herself? She raised her head, letting her eyes meet his.
She swallowed hard when he reached out to place his hands on either side of her face.
“Is it cancer?”
***

“She’s just waking up, now, Mom. I’ve got to go. I’ll call you tomorrow.” Jack slipped his cell phone into his back pocket as Rachel yawned, then pressed the button to bring the hospital bed
upright. He walked toward the bassinette, pointed his index finger at the sleeping baby, and raised his eyebrows.
Rachel nodded. “Yes. Please.”
Jack picked up their baby daughter and gently placed her in her mother’s arms. Tears gathered in his eyes as the scene played out exactly as it had six years ago when Lucie was born. He planted a tender kiss on Rachel’s lips before dropping into the bedside chair, content to see mother and child spending a few moments together before Sara was whisked away for bathing or whatever they did to newborns.
Sara deserved her own special time with her mother before the reality of life without Lucie—and the grief associated with it—overwhelmed every hour of Rachel’s days. She needs to know she is wanted and cherished. That her mommy and daddy will love and protect her. But how can we do that, God, when we failed to keep her sister safe?
Tears blurred his vision. He dabbed at his eyes with his thumb, allowing the sorrow to burrow deep into his heart. He had to be strong for Rachel.
He flipped open his wallet to stare at the newborn picture of Lucie taken in this very hospital. Red-faced and crying, she could not be consoled. Unlike the peaceful baby that now nursed at Rachel’s breast. The child who opened her fist and fanned her long slender fingers just as her big sister had. The one who sighed audibly as Rachel raised her to her shoulder and patted her back, eliciting a loud burp.
Rachel laughed and Jack joined in, enjoying together the first of many little things that would mesmerize them over the years. Things that would remind them of Lucie. Her smile. Her boundless energy. The way she liked to be tucked in bed with Mr. Bear and needed one last hug and kiss before they turned out the light.
And then the day would come when they would recognize things uniquely Sara. It might be the way she would wrinkle her nose, skip when happy, or turn her head at the mere mention of eating her broccoli—Lucie’s favorite.
Those things will transcend the heartbreak of today.
***
After a lunch of soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, Meg had decided they should do the weekly grocery shopping. As she put the food away, Renn listened to the morning’s phone messages. The one from Women’s Health confused him. They said Meg had missed her appointment Thursday morning and needed to reschedule.
But she’d told him she had gone. That’s why she’d been late coming home after work.
Why had she told him that if it wasn’t true? Was she keeping something from him? Reality began to surface, the pain of her lie stinging his heart as he walked toward the kitchen.

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