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Erased Reproach - A Beyond the Trial Novella

By Chigozie Anuli Mbadugha

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Erased Reproach





Chapter One

Captivity turned around can appear like a dream. Funke pinched herself to be sure she was not dreaming. Frank’s proposal erased the reproach and shame she had endured for years. Suddenly she no longer needed to hide and stay out of public view. The mutterings and sudden cessation of conversations as she approached had stopped. The mockery in some people’s demeanour was replaced by admiration and envy as some wished they were in her shoes. The same shoes that were leprous and exuding a stench in the past. Mothers who told their daughters to stay away from Funke now used her as an example to the same daughters. As she clung to Frank and danced at their wedding reception, the memories came flooding back…











Funke Ojo was a tall, beautiful damsel with an hour-glass figure that was the envy of her contemporaries in Ondo town, South-West Nigeria. Her walk was purposeful and regal, but despite her beauty, she lacked self-confidence and deeply desired peer approval. She wanted to ‘belong’ to the in-crowd. This feeling stemmed partly from the fact that she was the only child of her mother. She had a step-mother and five half-siblings who treated her like the outsider in their midst. Her mother tried to be her friend and confidant, but there were issues Funke found extremely difficult to discuss with her.
With time, she joined a clique of girls who were confident, popular, and streetwise. The girls wasted no time in letting Funke know that they only allowed her to join their group because of her beauty. They set out to teach her all she needed to know about being a member of one of the most popular girls’ groups in Ondo town. Funke learnt quickly.
The other members of the group were Bisi, Agnes, and Martha. Funke found Agnes easy to talk to and depended on her a lot for advice. Agnes advised her to choose a male friend from her numerous admirers so that other boys would stop pestering her for friendship. Funke jettisoned the idea initially because her mother had cautioned her against premarital associations with members of the opposite gender. She gave Funke several reasons why such relationships were dangerous. When Funke repeated some of them to Agnes, she hushed her and looked around as if she was embarrassed and hoping nobody overheard their conversation.
 

“Funke!” she chided, “Don’t let someone else hear some of these things you’re saying. They’ll feel that you’re not moving with the times. Your mother is passing on old wives’ tales she heard from her mother and grandmother to you. Look, we are in the digital age. Never mind that we live in a semi-rural area, half of the things you’ve said are no longer in vogue. They are ancient ideologies.”
“I don’t understand,” said Funke, confused about her friend’s divergent opinion.
Agnes looked at her, bemused at her naivety.
“How old are you, Funke?” she asked.
“Seventeen,” replied Funke. “What’s that got to do with our discussion?”
“A lot. Most of our mothers didn’t have formal schooling for more than six to ten years of their lives before getting married. At your age, they would have been married with at least two children in the kitty. Today, we have the opportunity to be educated in tertiary institutions. Funke, we’re worlds apart. Young men today are attracted to women who are knowledgeable about life and social issues. Naivety doesn’t attract, it repels,” argued Agnes.
Funke shook her head in disbelief and stared incredulously at her friend.
“But I’m not ready for a relationship now,” she argued, “I come from a middle-class family. I’m in competition with my half-siblings for Papa’s sponsorship for university education. I’m already disadvantaged as a girl and the only child of my mother. I need to focus on my education. Passing my examinations may make Papa agree to pay for my university education.”






“And who says you can’t focus on your education while having fun?” asked Agnes. “After all, there’s a famous saying that ‘all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.’ Funke, you’ll learn to manage your time effectively, that’s all.”
Funke said nothing.
Agnes looked at her confused and pensive friend.
“Funke, I’m your friend. I can’t mislead you. In fact, I know a brilliant boy who likes you a lot. If you date him, he may even help you with your studies.”
“Does he need to date me to help me with my studies?” asked Funke. When Agnes did not reply, she smiled and continued. “Anyway, what’s his name?”
“He’s tall, handsome, and brilliant. Bisi and Martha call him our school’s ‘most eligible boyfriend.’ His name is Dayo Adedeji.”
Funke laughed at Bisi and Martha’s assessment of Dayo Adedeji. Both girls were difficult to impress. So, for Dayo to have received their seal of approval, there must be something unique about him. She knew they would have laughed her to scorn if they were the ones she talked to about her discomfiture with school romance. She was jolted out of her thoughts by Agnes, who was tugging at her skirt to get her attention.
“Are you already daydreaming about Dayo?” she teased. “What were you thinking about? You were so deep in thought; you didn’t hear me speaking to you.”






“I was thinking about Bisi and Martha. It’s a good thing they’re not here. They would have mocked my ‘ancient ideologies’ as Martha likes to call such divergent opinions,” replied Funke.
They laughed together for the first time since they started their conversation.
“I’ll spare you some pain. They’ll both think you’re ‘uncool’ if I tell them about this conversation, so my lips are sealed. But tell me, Funke, does this mean you’re still a virgin?” asked Agnes.
“Yes. Aren’t you all?” replied Funke.
Agnes laughed loud and long, holding her sides with her hands. Tears dropped from her eyes, and she fished out some tissue from her pocket and wiped them away. When she finally stopped laughing, she turned to Funke and said:
“Interesting! I don’t think most girls in our class still are. You’re one weird babe!”
Funke was too dazed to speak. While she searched for an appropriate response to Agnes’s revelation, the bell signifying the end of break time was rung. Agnes got up, straightened her skirt, and without waiting for Funke, started walking briskly towards their classroom. Funke scampered after her, wondering at the sudden change in Agnes’s mood and disposition. Usually, they both made a dash for the classroom once the bell was rung. Sometimes they competed to see who would outrun the other. At other times, they just held hands and ran. Funke liked the spirit of camaraderie the latter gave her.

Funke was so engrossed in her thoughts that she barely heard the first half of the English lesson. Her mind kept wandering to the discussion she had with Agnes at break time. She looked contemplatively at the girls in her class, who she had presumed were as innocent as she was. She began to feel like an outsider amongst them.
 

Was it possible that Agnes was wrong about her assertion? After all, how could she know every girl’s experience? She looked in the direction of Agnes’s seat at the far end of the row of seats behind hers. Agnes caught her gaze and winked. Funke looked away abruptly. Had their situations been reversed, Funke felt she would have been too embarrassed to admit she was no longer a virgin, but Agnes did not seem to care. Funke wondered if she should discuss it with her mother then thought better of it. Mama would immediately forbid her from interacting with her friends, and she did not want that. She felt accepted when she was with them.

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